Maintaining Bodily Autonomy While Pregnant
“Bodily autonomy is the simple but radical concept that individuals have the right to control what does and does not happen to our bodies. When we have full bodily autonomy, not only are we empowered to make decisions about our health and future – without coercion or control by others – we also have the support and resources needed to meaningfully carry out these decisions.” -Positive Women’s Network
As a birthing person, specifically as a birthing teenager, naming and claiming your bodily autonomy can support you in feeling empowered in any pregnancy experience and outcome.
Bodily autonomy and family planning-- including the decision to carry a pregnancy or seek abortion care-- go hand in hand. If you are pregnant, it is our hope that the ideas we share in this article contribute to your sense of trust in your body and your decisions.
Ways to Name and Claim Your Bodily Autonomy While Pregnant
Find care providers you feel safe with. It is crucial that you feel heard and respected by your care providers. If you try a provider and don’t feel as supported as you need to be, consider looking for another provider. If your options are limited due to insurance status or Medicaid, call upon people and things that help you feel safe. For instance, take a loved one, friend, or doula to your appointments, bring a list of questions, ask the provider to slow down, and so on. Additionally, practice taking up space and getting as comfortable as you can with your providers. This includes speaking up about your needs, asking questions, and requesting extra resources/information.
Honor and nourish your body. Choose healthy foods that you enjoy and foods that feel good to your body. Move in ways that your body enjoys. Practice personal care that feels really good to you; this could include taking baths, low-intensity workouts such as walking or swimming, putting on make-up, wearing comfy clothes, or whatever YOU and YOUR body need.
Listen to your body. When you are tired, do your best to honor the need for rest. When you are hungry, snack or sit down for a hearty meal. When your mind is racing, take a break. Our dominant United States culture teaches us to rush, work harder, and do more. Thus, listening to your body may be a new skill that you learn to cultivate. You know your body best, if something doesn't “feel right in your gut”, listen to it!
Research your options. When it comes to any medical care or medical procedures, knowing and researching your options will help you feel the most empowered and able to consent or refuse options. Read blogs, take classes, talk to providers you trust (#1), and ask for evidence-based information to help you in making medical decisions.
Know that you don’t owe anyone answers or explanations. If there are friends or family members who ask questions about your decisions or experiences, and you don’t wish to disclose, that’s okay. When someone asks an invasive question, you might set a boundary by saying something like, “I will let you know if I am ready to talk about that another time.”
You have permission to shut down unwanted advice. Unfortunately, people tend to give unsolicited advice. Whether they were in a similar situation or they think they know the “right” way to handle reproductive situations, people might try to give you advice. It’s okay to say, “I don’t need any more information on that topic, thanks.”
Continue doing things that make you YOU. Pregnancy or abortion can become overwhelming or all-consuming experiences. It can be helpful to do things unrelated to these experiences.
Hold physical boundaries. If someone touches your body in an unwelcome way, even if they have good intentions, say “no.” This is your body and your choice, and nobody needs access to touch that you are not 100% comfortable with.
Practice saying NO. Yes means yes and no means no. We often feel obligated to say yes or agree to a procedure that we are not really comfortable with, lack full understanding of, or simply just don't want done. Regardless of age, you have the right to say no.
Use your voice. Your feelings, thoughts, questions, and concerns matter. Speak them out loud and let them be known. Exercise your right to free speech; communicate about topics that are important to you with your medical provider and/or parent or legal guardian. This is your pregnancy, your voice matters FIRST.
Reach Out for Support
At Project Teenbirth, our purpose is to educate, support, and empower pregnant teens and young parents throughout all pregnancy outcomes. We stand by all birthing teens and consider your bodily autonomy the center of our work. Please reach out if you would like to hear more about our full-spectrum doula support services.
Author: Courtney Harris is a witness, space-holder, supporter, and caregiver for families of all types and in all stages; she has worked with youth and their families since 2008. Currently, Courtney serves as a Life Coach for Teens and a Companion for Birth and Beyond. She is passionate about honoring life’s transitions and believes that all birthing people deserve compassionate, steady, and informed support throughout their unique reproductive journeys. You can connect with Courtney here and across all social media platforms at @companioncourtney.